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According to Webster’s dictionary, “addiction” is a confirmed habit, “the quality or state of being addicted,” or a compulsive need for a substance of any kind. There are all kinds of addictions to a variety of different things: drugs, alcohol, food, sugar, chocolate, starch and caffeine, to name a few. There are other kinds of addictions which are more subtle: exercise, worry, negativity, fear, obsessive-compulsive behavior, shopping, gum-chewing—to name a few. The question is: why do we do these things, or OVER-DO these things to the point where they are not good for us? An addiction is only negative if it conflicts with our well-being or peace of mind in some insidious way where we don’t have any control over ourselves or our behaviors.
The definition of self-awareness is: “to be conscious of oneself.” Now you get the picture! If, in fact, we are aware of ourselves on a very deep level, then the CAUSES or REASONS for our addictions are lessened or eradicated all together. My perspective on addictions is that we are driven to unhealthy behaviors when we have unresolved emotional conflicts inside of us. That baggage creates a kind of disturbance in our souls which DRIVES us to behave in ways which are bad for us, or causes us discomfort and pain. The addiction to whatever we choose to utilize can be relieved temporarily by this substance, but ultimately, it creates more of the same unless the soul-affliction is resolved or at least made visible to us. An addiction BECOMES an addiction because it FEELS good at the time and it eases our dis-ease so that we keep trying to SOOTHE and comfort ourselves. That behavior is what addiction is: a compulsion to do something repeatedly which negatively impacts our lives in some way. It is a viscous cycle which will continue ad infinitum unless we discover a way to stop it. Addictions obviously have the ability to KILL, destroy or irrevocably shake the foundation of our lives. They can cause accidents, murders and a host of unwitting and dire consequences.
How can we possibly solve a problem as ancient and debilitating as an addiction? It seems insurmountable and impossible, at times, but history, common sense, twelve step programs and science have proved to us that this is not true. I have heard people say, “I just can’t help myself.” And I know that for many people, it feels as if they can’t handle their addictions alone. And more often than not, they do need help. The good news is that “help” abounds if one is motivated to find it; help is everywhere. But before we can expound on why, where and how help is possible, we have to first understand what addiction really means and what creates addictive thinking. We need to distinguish between “normal” thinking and addictive thinking, between addicts and non- addicts, and between addictive behaviors and non-addictive behaviors. The differences are significant and can explain and illuminate this very cunning and baffling issue.
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